Tuesday 28 August 2007

Mixed Metaphor And Other Messed-up-ness.



Hello my little ones. I pray that all is good with you.
Time for work! I have decided that for the next few posts I will try to utilise at least one mixed metaphor or confused quotation. I have some examples for you so that you may get an idea of what it is that I am looking for. So, without further ado I give you 'Mixed Metaphors'
Veni vidi vino or in vino vici, something like that only maybe a little more sophisticated (except veni vidi are verbs in the first person perfect tense
and vino isn't).
Stupid is fine too, in fact stupid is good.
Double mixed metaphors. A bird in the hand isn't worth a poke in the eye with a blunt stick whilst beating on a dead horse; which reminds me... I used to be into bestiality and necrophillia but I gave it up...it was too much like flogging a dead horse! Arf arf! (the old 'uns are best, albeit decomposed).
You can't break all your chickens without making an omelette in a basket. Or, don't bust your eggs doing chicken in a basket, large fries on the side.
Too many careless cooks cost lives.
Loose lips spoil the broth.
You can't keep a good man from going down on the ship.
Do not ask what your mom may cook for your dinner tonight rather what could you could do for mom's dinner.
When all is said and dusted.
If the shoe were on the other hand.
If the cap fits there'll be no flies on you.
Here today, there the day after too.
Mutton dressed as a ten buck hooker.
Hail Mary full of grapes.
In the name of the father the son and the holy teenage mutant ninja turtles.
God is great! could become; God is fairly cool!
Cooking up a slight squall.
Cooking up a can of worms.
That's let the cat out of the bin/doghouse.
Out of the frying pan and into the dog-house.
The devil makes work for naughty hands.
and my current favorite; More fuck for your Buck no..that can't be right? More Buck for your fuck.
So as you may have noticed I am struggling a little on the creative front - If each of you my pretty ones could provide me with oh..say half-a-dozen mixed metaphors (or something similar) in the absence of any real scandal and sordid stuff from amongst us I guess it may help. Also any assistance with story line or plot on the blog would be also much appreciated I seem to have lost it. The plot that is.
As well as being chosen for your grace, beauty, wit and charm you are here to muse too; so go ahead..muse me! Special favours to those that excel. Can't say unfairer than that!
Love, peace and disorder.
Yours Balthazar B

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